Amid the clatter and din of the chaos in the world it’s sometimes difficult to find joy.

It’s imperative we don’t get bogged down by the negativity of our individual lives, family dynamics, work and the outside world.

Joy is to be had without looking too far, but it’s not the same as happiness.

“Happiness usually involves a victory for the self. Joy tends to involve the transcendence of self. Happiness comes from accomplishments. Joy comes when your heart is in another,” writes New York Times columnist David Brooks. “The core point is that happiness is good, but joy is better. It’s smart to enjoy happiness, but it’s smarter still to put yourself in situations where you might experience joy.”

In this particular column he goes on to write about friendship and the joys of it.

Joy through friendship is huge for me. It’s sharing. Sometimes it’s sharing the same experience and then being able to relive those memories—which brings happiness for years to come. Sometimes it’s sharing tears and joy from afar.

While some might think joy cannot come from tears, I disagree. It’s the joy in knowing I have people who are there for me, and that I am there for them. It’s being in the moment, in their moment. It’s about giving them my full attention without any expectations other than to be a friend.

Perhaps if we all stepped back more often from the rigors of the day, we could find a way to carve time to bring joy to others. That in itself is going to positively affect the giver as well.

While the problems of the world may seem overwhelming and insurmountable, I believe we can all do better in bringing joy to those around us. I’m still idealistic enough to believe that positivity can spread and bring greater joy to those we may not even know—which in turn will bring us happiness.

Be the joy you want to receive.